Crowds

One thing I've come to notice, is that in my mom's house, it is always healthy to have at least one person missing. There is a strange peace that just exists. But when the house is full, I just get stressed out. I am awesome in crowds that I can perform to, so its' definitely not a "I Hate crowds" thing. When I was in Fiji on my LDS mission, my youngest siblings got along. That in itself was a miracle. when i got back, My brother "Flub" had moved up to Utah, and My Brother "T" and I got along. VERY MIRACULOUS. and even when "Flub" and I hung out, we got along. but whenever we are all in the house, as my aunt would say, the veins in my neck need to be pushed in. I just get so stressed out. If I were to say "I don't care what anyone thinks" that'd be about 80 % true. I really care about my family's perception of me. and when I start to goof  something up, I really start to shut down. And that doesn't come without my yelling first.